best friends for life!!

These are a little late but hey i've been pretty lousy at blogging sooo here are some pictures of Trykk and his bff! Well technically as his parents we are forcing them to be friends but the pictures speak pretty loudly...so far they LOVE each other! Jace was born 14 days after Trykk and as destiny plays out they will spend eons together as buds for life!

This weekend we attended a birthday party for Kadence and Bella Goldkuhl. The girls were so cute running to each party station, playing with their friends, coloring and giggling. It was so fun to watch all the little ladies having so much fun! It's even more fun to imagine our little men (Trykk and Jace) running around playing football or monster trucks. One day we'll be the parents kissing owies and scrambling for the sponge bob bandaides. Can't wait!!




The boys just stare at each other right now but soon they'll be giggling and stealing each others toys :)


Jace and Alicia with Trykk and I. More fun to come boys!!

say cheese!

My boss let me borrow her super sweet camera for a work project and of course I had to take some pictures of my boy :). Oh how that little face makes me smile! Doug and I always comment "Man, we sure made a cute kid!". It's true right!?!
Sooooo in between (what I was SUPPOSED to be using the camera for) I snapped a few shots of my girls too. I'm lucky to have 7 neices but only blessed to see 2 of them on a regular basis. Dougs sister and brother have 3 girls total and my sister has another gorgeous 4! Love them all so much!!



Jordan, Isabella, and Paige with Trykk. The girls just love the baby to pieces! They play with him, hold him, push him around in a laundry basket! Ha...can't wait to spend some more time with my New Mexico chicks as well!!



Haha they light up any room! Bella just makes me laugh...that girl can turn anything into a joke! Her silly faces and New Jersey accent are to die!! Learning and growing everyday!! Paige is such a smiley little one. She loves anything cuddly and just cuddles up to you in a second! What fun she had meeting the baby for the first time. Paige laughed so hard when Grammy showed her how silly he is in the bath tub...hearing kids laugh is so sweet. Now for our Jordan! Little beauty that one! She is so kind and sweet, always ready to lend a helping hand and just so in love with her family! Miss Jordan is growing up to be such a wonderful little lady. I'm so blessed to have them in my life!



He is so curious this one...his Grammy and Grampa sure know how to make him smile! He doesn't do it much for the camera cause he's always to busy studying the flash :) Oh and here are his toes...I love baby toes...oh and just check out baby hands sometime. Not really their hands though...no open their hand and check out the palm...sooo precious! I don't know why but seeing all the miniture creases and wrinkles in his pudgy little palms just get me...

Giving thanks without the turkey...

This weekend started like all the rest. Waking up too my little beam of sunshine all ready for his baa baa. Slowly falling back to sleep after a nice feeding. But on this Saturday morning my phone rang at an unusual 7:12 am. My dad was calling. In his own super casual way he let me know he was in the hospital. From there my mind went directly to my grandmother...what had happened this time! Well no he says he is there...they think he's had a heartattack! I can't even explain the shock! At that moment I felt like a train horn was waking me out of some strange coma. I guess at first I just kept thinking "What!? I don't understand?" He says well last night I was having some chest pain and I thought I should come in to check it out. He then tells me he left the hospital after they said he was showing signs of a heartattack but couldn't be sure until they admitted him for observation. Who leaves the hospital when they say you could be having a heartattack!? Well my dad is that guy!! Luckily for us he changed his mind and went back soon after...HUGE sigh of relief!

A few hours later I got a call from my grandmother relaying the results. The doctors said my father had a massive heartattack. After an angiogram they discovered 2 large arteries we're 100% blocked causing the whole right of his heart to give out. There was absolutely no blood flow to the right side of his heart! Of course they made it clear if he hadn't come back to the hospital the night before he may not be with us anymore. I was stunned. I'm still feeling a bit confused. Granted my dad hasn't been to a doctor in who knows how long so how could we see this coming?

He is fine now after they put 3 stints in to re-open blockage but wow that's my dad we are talking about! Shakes you to the core!! I love him soo very much and he needs to be a grandpa to my son! Thank goodness this was something they could take care of so quickly and efficiently! Now the battle rages on...he must quit smoking!! I'm doing my best to encourage his quitting but that will be on his shoulders...

Now I must go back and realize I have much to be thankful for...my son, my parents, my wonderful boyfriend, the roof over my head and the stars in the sky! All of this is a gift...we must be greatful each and everyday!

It's been far to long...

I feel terrible! I haven't written in so long! Little update:
Trykk is 4 months now and gettin big!! Went to the doctor (because we were suspicious of his ear tuggin/runny nose) and he weighs in at 13 lbs. 11 oz.! Next Friday we have our 4 month appt. so i'll have his height then too.

We tried to give him rice cereal the other day. Just thought we'd see whether or not he liked it...you'll see his reaction in the photos below :). He now eats formula a couple times a day because I can't keep up with his eating. I'm working part time again and pumping is such a pain in my rear. I'm proud i've made it 4 months with nursing and hopefully I can feed him when i'm home. We'll see how long that lasts, keeping our fingers crossed! Formula makes his poop soooo awful! It stinks terrible! My kid is officially the stinky kid in class...ha just kidding.

Let's see we've also taken him swimming 3 times! He loves it almost as much as the bathtub. He's rolling over pretty consistently now and loves to eat his fingers!! He also started going to the babysitters (our friend Kourtney) two days a week. He seems to like that probably because he gets to play with his buddy Mariah. Doug says Mariah is his girlfriend! :) Trykk gets one day a week with Grammy Bartel too. Of course they both enjoy that tremendously!!

Things are going well...got tons of fun stuff planned for the summer so i shall be keeping up with blogging! Lots of adventures for the little man :)


This face just cracked me up...looks like his Momma right here.

Almost everytime we push on his legs he farts..Hilarious if you ask me!

We spent the day in San Manuel with my Gran and Papa...he was pretty tuckered out :)

My Dad and the baby...funniest faces ever!

This is the famous rice cereal incident...can you tell how much he liked it !!!

Even looking at this cracks me up...he was sitting on my chest and kinda scooted his way on to my neck and then went ballistic from there! He was going nuts, standing, rocking, jumping...then he folded over my head and started drooling in my hair...he was seriously suffocating me but thought that was just soo funny! I had to literally push him off...good times with my baby

There's those mysterious eyes again?! What color are those little buggers?

We went to visit Daddy at work the other day and I dressed him like Dougs little twin. So cute :)

That face is to die :)

one step at a time...

Today was a beautiful day. Today was the birthday of a very good friend who passed away a few years ago. It's hard to imagine life will someday cease for each of us. I haven't been faced with death to many times but with each it becomes a little easier to deal with. I've always felt at peace with loss and the image of heaven. But this year has been filled with so many gifts of life that I had honestly forgotten to even think it could happen any other way.

With the birth of my son I felt so unimaginably blessed. I will never forget the moment he graced us with his presence, his perfect little cry. I became a mother! Now I live for him, I would die for him. He's asleep here next to me and with each little raspy breath I can't help but fight tears. I understand now what it might possibly feel like to lose a child. I'm a mommy! I couldn't imagine the pain...He holds my heart so tightly in his tiny hands.

Today I was playing with him, bouncing and singing while he layed on my legs. As I reached to pull him onto my chest, in a second, I realized his little arm didn't quite turn that way. I saw in his face that I had pulled, maybe just a smidge, the wrong way. In an instant I knew to pull him close because there it was, the build up for an inevitable wail!! Oh that cry could have me on my knees. We cried together. I hurt my baby. Ok of course I didn't MEAN to and maybe it wasn't even as bad as i'm making it sound but that cry just had me! I don't think i've cried like that in a very VERY long time. I just kept repeating, "I'm sorry! I love you!". He stopped crying much sooner than I did but that was really hard. I had to share this, I needed to get it off my chest...I can't help but feel guilty! Today i've looked at him differently...he is my gift. A gift I will cherish and hold as close as possbible for as long as I can.

I will always keep the friends i've lost in my heart and their families in my prayers.

Wishes for the future...

I wish I could have more days like these...years and years of perfection!

I wish my son will someday recognize how much his parents love him! Deep-deep-gut-wrenching-soul-shaking love!!

Wish I could become a better more insightful writer, articulating my words to actually mean something more than a ramble!

I wish my honey would ask me to marry him...not because i want some outlandish white wedding or some cheesy huge ring but because I truly madly deeply love him! With all my heart I know we could make it...we WILL stand the test of time, i'm confident about that.

I wish I could find that perfect job where I could spend unlimited time with my precious little cherub AND make some extra cash to lighten my honeys load.

Wish people could all be this happy! This one I am very VERY sure about. I wish people could share in my happiness. In this moment I am wishing for happy thoughts and my favorite...peace.

I wish things could stay just how they are...perfect :)

Lazy Dayz

I love days where I can really enjoy my son! Lay here and just suck in all his beautiful little features. He makes me truly happy! Loving him...

Anyway!! This last weeked was Dougs birthday. We went to Monkey Business for pizza and games with his family. The baby had loads of fun. Oh and that reminds me. We went to the bowling alley a few nights before that and Trykk was lit up with smiles!! He had sooo much fun! Seriously...talking!, yelling, playing with his toys and smiling so huge! We couldn't get enough. Back to birthday- Doug enjoyed his cards and then went out with friends. That wasn't really his best idea but oh well he's been forgiven haha. Saturday we went to a car show and then his businesses open house grand opening for their new shop. That was a really good time of course! The baby was asleep in Mommy for most of it ha!!

Sunday was a different story because I wasn't feeling so hot...turns out Mommy got strep throat!!! AGH! Daddy to the rescue! I'm lucky enough to have a fabulous loving caring man in my life who is willing to stay home and take care of his son while I sleep all day. What a blessing because I really needed it!

Feeling much better that's for sure...now I need to clean my house!! Scrub out the sickness :)